Vindicated
by Quarried Times
Summary: It doesn't take much to change your life completely. One day, one meeting, one person could make such a difference. Maybe even for the better. - SoRiku, Yaoi, AU
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I know. I have lots of other stories to write to. Why do I insist on just writing new ones?! I don't know. I don't care. Read this if you please! XD **

**This is my first ever SoRiku. It's probably really...mediocre or like, mainstream. Idk what I'm doing with my life anymore...too much fanfiction on the brain. And don't worry, I will continue White Noise. Anyways. Lemme know your thoughts and everything else that you would like to tell me after reading this! Thanks. **

* * *

-Vindicated-

I sighed heavily, an exasperated sound, as I walked the school hallways, holding a piece of death in my hands. I stared down at the paper for the fifth time in the past 2 minutes, feeling sick with nerves.

_How could this have happened? I studied all night…I thought I understood most of the material…and yet, I get this. _

I sighed again, feeling as if I would be doing that all day. I walked slowly down the halls, only because it was still at least another three minutes until the bell rang. And my next class was just down the hallway, so I wouldn't have to worry about being late. I heard soft, familiar footsteps approaching me from behind. Of course, I knew who that was.

"Hey Sora! What did you get on the—"

I turned to her, my expression probably portraying that fact clearly.

"Oh …Sora, it'll be okay, I'm sure it's not that bad." Her eyes looked sincere enough, though they didn't make me feel any better. I blinked a few times, not looking back at her before I stepped up to the nearest trash can. I held the paper of doom over the receptacle and began ripping it up. I ripped and ripped, not crazily, just angry like, until there was nothing left. The small pieces of white paper floated to the bottom of the garbage, hopefully never to haunt me again.

I turned slowly back to her, trying to smile to hide the fact that I had just went psycho on a piece of paper. "I-its fine, Kairi. I'm fine." My fake smile was doing nothing for me.

She pursed her lips together, I'd kind of hoped that she was used to me acting weird by now. After we had been going out for this long. Kairi was my first girlfriend. She still is, I guess. She was pretty, I was really lucky to have her. I loved her bright red hair that flowed down to her shoulders. I loved her deep blue eyes and her features. She was the perfect girl for me. I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't asked her out that day. She was always sticking up for me, though sometimes I felt like I should be a little stronger. I was the man in this relationship anyway.

"Sora…stop spacing out on me, you're starting to get me worried." Her voice was soft and kind, like she really meant what she was saying.

I swallowed my fear and nodded to her, washing away all evidence that I was still angry about the test grade. "I'm sorry; I was just realizing how good you are to me. Thanks for always being there."

Kairi blinked twice, her long eye lashes fluttering. "Sora. You don't need to thank me for anything. I'm your girlfriend, it's my job," she said, smiling still. I looked back at her with hopeful eyes. "And try not to worry so much about what your parents will do. I'm sure they will be just fine about it; you tried your hardest."

Well that was a lie if I ever heard one. My parents were nothing like that. I'd be chewed out for sure.

"Mmm, maybe," I said anyway, not wanting to sound mean. At least she was trying to cheer me up.

Her bright warm smile lightened my heart as she grasped onto my arm, latching us together like two handcuffs. She started leading me down the hallway, off to our next class which we had together. "History won't be as bad, I'm sure," she reassured me.

Not long after Mr. Jordan had started his lecture of the Middle Ages I'd already dosed off. Kairi sat next to me of course, as she did in every class we had together. She would always let me copy her notes so I wasn't worried. I was doing well in this class actually. It was only math that killed me in the long run.

The bell rang much too soon and I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, the ringing still in my ears. "Come on, time to wake up," Kairi said cheerfully as if she had just enjoyed the past hour of lecture.

I groaned softly, sitting up from my warm desk. "Why are you always so happy in school? Don't you get sick of it?"

Kairi laughed jauntily. "I only like it because I get to see you, silly."

I laughed with her, grabbing my books off the desk we headed towards the door. "Does that make me a bad boyfriend for not being happy at school then?"

Kairi slipped her hand into mine, lacing our fingers together. "No, I don't think that's it."

I huffed, still clinging to her hand in mine. "Well when you figure it out, tell me."

She laughed once again and pulled me through the door. We slowed down once we were out of the crowd; it was nice to just walk with her sometimes.

"I love lunch time!" she exclaimed as we entered the cafeteria.

"You go get lunch, I'll be at the table," I said, laughing in-between my sentence. Even if she was a girl, she seriously loved to eat.

"Aren't you going to have anything?" she asked, puzzled.

I shook my head. "Naw, I'm not really hungry. I had a big breakfast."

Actually, it was because that stupid sick feeling wouldn't leave me. If I tried to eat anything now, I wouldn't be able to hold it down much later on.

She puffed up her cheeks and let go of my hand. "Fine, I'll be there in a sec!"

At that she took off running into the lunch line. I sighed again, regretting that because I had tried not to do that much today. It wasn't really working out.

I slumped off to my lunch table, where all my friends sat. I soon saw it and smiled. My friends were always nice to me. Maybe they could help me forget about the test.

"Sora! Not eating today?" Roxas smirked at me; as if he had some kind of inside joke as to why not eating anything was funny.

I used my breakfast excuse and sat down on the edge of the table, next to Namine, who was smiling her warm comforting smile at me. I looked around the table, smiling at every one of my friends. Axel was almost clinging to Roxas, I had no idea what those guys's relationship was now a days. Tidus was fighting with Wakka, saying something about how he really wanted that chicken nugget. Selphie was on the other side of them, trying to break up their fighting. Though, it didn't look like she was doing such a good job. Demyx sat on the other side of Axel, his face stretched into a large grin, as it always was.

I was suddenly so glad to be here, with my friends. They were so carefree and happy; it made me realize that I was worrying over something as stupid as a test grade. It wasn't the end of the world, I'd live. And I'd do better on the next one.

_Yeah, I'll definitely pick up my pace by the next test. I'll be even better at it. I'll get a tutor if I have to and—_

"Hey Sora. The new kid is staring at you." Axel's voice caught me so off guard that I turned around abruptly, not even thinking before hitting an expecting stare. I thought maybe for a second it was a girl, maybe I had another fan. Namine had asked me out before, but I was already dating Kairi. I'd been asked out before too, but only after I'd started dating the redhead. Maybe I just seemed too innocent or something to date before her. While thinking this, I really didn't expect to see him.

He was staring at me, as if he hadn't moved his eyes from me since lunch began. But the problem wasn't that, it was that I couldn't take my eyes off _him_ either.

_He's so…gorgeous. _

His shoulder length silver hair glistened in the lunch room lights. He had mesmerizing blue-green eyes; I suddenly felt the need to sit closer so I could look further into them. Hia features were perfect, the best I'd ever seen. He was beautiful, amazing, flawless, the most incredible human being I'd ever seen in my life. It was weird, thinking those things while staring at the stranger. I'd never really been one to find guys attractive. Besides a few guys here at the school, I never thought guys were at all appealing. Sure Axel was good looking and Roxas was cute too, but never had the thought crossed my mind that I'd actually enjoy being with one of them.

It was definitely weird.

I noticed, while I was contemplating my sexual orientation, that the boy still hadn't let his gaze falter. His eyes were still focused intently on me and only me as if I was the only one in the whole room. Was it unnerving? Yea, a little bit I guess. Though…I sort of liked the way he looked at me. His eyes were deep and confusing. I felt like there was a whole story to unfold within them. I also noticed that he was hardly blinking at all, like that would take away from the time he could look at me. I wondered quickly if I was doing the same thing.

"Sora! Who are you staring…?" Kairi's voice filled my ears and I was sure she had already found out. For once, I was a little angry to hear her voice; it made me rip away from the stare of the beautiful stranger. When my eyes left his intense gaze, I felt weird. I wanted to look back at him instead of at my other friends at the table. He was so much more intriguing.

"Oh, the new guy. He's a senior, can you believe it? They say that he was kicked out of three other schools before! I heard he was sent here as a last resort before juvenile hall," Kairi gossiped as she sat down next to me with her tray of food.

I swallowed, feeling how dry my throat suddenly was.

_How could someone so amazing and perfect be that bad? _

Again, I forced myself not to reattach the weird yet comfortable stare between me and the new kid; instead I asked the first thing that came to mind.

"What's his name?" I kept my head down, my eyes focused on my short finger nails. I picked at them for a second, realizing that no one was answering me. But what was strange was that everyone was silent, as if they had all heard me, even Demyx wasn't talking and that was just plain weird.

_Did I ask something weird? Did it sound like I was implying anything? Why are they all staring at me?_

"Uhmm, Riku, I think," Kairi finally answered after my few moments of mental breakdown.

I nodded and focused back down on my fingernails, the urge inside me growing and growing to look back at the boy. I felt his stare on my back; at least, I hoped I did. Was he still looking at me? I wanted to know. I wanted to know _badly_.

_Why am I getting so paranoid like this? Why am I freaking out?_

I finally noticed my franticly beating heart. It pounded in my ears, making me feel even more uncomfortable.

The talking at the table had started up again, but I felt as if I was outside of some kind of loop. It was hard to keep up with the conversations, though I tried as best I could.

"Roxy, what are you doing tonight? It's Friday, we should hang out." That was Axel's voice. He sounded almost like he was pleading; he usually talked like that when he was around Roxas. I realized that he seemed to act like a girl with a crush on him sometimes.

_Why am I noticing this just now? _

"Not if it involves anything like last time when you—"

"Shh…" Axel had clapped his hand over Roxas' mouth, stopping his answer. "No need to tell everyone…"

Demyx erupted into laughter, hitting Axel playfully on the back. "Axe, you dog!"

Axel just smirked, glancing down at Roxas, whose face was set into a glare hidden by the blushing. I suddenly really wanted to ask them a question:

_Do you guys like each other? _

I almost had to cup _my_ hand over my _own_ mouth to stop the stupidly weird inquiry from bubbling out. I shut my eyes tightly instead, trying to rid my head of the weird thoughts I was having.

_Axel and Roxas are only friends. Guys can only be friends to other guys. That's just how it works. _

_Unless…_

Groaning, I stood up from the table, my hands hitting it with more force than intended. This was all that Riku guy's fault. Making me think weird thoughts only because he was so absolutely gorgeous.

I noticed that everyone's eyes were on me and that I was just standing there like an idiot. Even Kairi, who had been so consumed in her food that she hadn't even noticed my lack of talking, was staring up at me.

_Say something to them… _

I blushed, thinking quickly. "I-I'm gunna go get a drink, I'll be right b-back." I stumbled over my words, knowing all my friends at the table were still looking at me as I clumsily walked away from them.

_What is the matter with me? I see one good looking guy and I practically go insane. Kairi is your girlfriend. Your __**girlfriend**__. You like girls. Guys are stupid. And gross and unattractive and so totally—_

"Hey, Brownie."

I froze. That voice almost chilled me to the bone. It was smooth and cool. Calm and collected yet dangerous. It almost hurt to turn in the direction of it. Over all of the other voices that flooded the crowded lunch room, his was the one I heard perfectly. His turquoise eyes were locked on mine again. My head became flustered; I wasn't thinking straight.

_This isn't good._

"Where are you going in such a hurry?"

Again I was forgetting to blink, and to breathe. I could do nothing but stare at him like he was some kind of angel. Hmmm, maybe he was.

One perfect eyebrow shot up and he blinked a couple times, his eyes going towards the empty seats around him. "Sit."

It wasn't more than two seconds before I was sitting down across from him. I barely had time to think about what I was doing before I did it.

_I usually don't act like this. I tend to think before I do things most of the time. Okay so that's not totally true. But still…this guy has me all flustered I—_

"Are you scared of me too?" he asked, his eyes were still on mine. I was glad for a moment, being this close to him. I could finally see the depth of his eyes; the secrets that they held were tugging at my mind like a string. It was like they were pulling me in. I couldn't help but be entranced by them.

_If only I could find out what made them like that. He must have so many things hidden behind his eyes. _

"Are you a mute, or are you really just that afraid?"

_God, he's asking me questions and here I am staring at him like a freaking stalker. _

"N-no, I can talk…" _Idiot. He didn't mean that literally... _

I thought I saw his lip turn up into a small smirk. Looking back at his face I noticed the smile looked amazing on him. I was even more engrossed.

"So you _do_ speak," he said, his smirk turning into a full open mouth smile. I blinked a few times to hide my stare. The blushing was going to be difficult to cover up though…"What else can you do?"

_Don't say anything stupid. Don't say anything stupid! _

"I-I dunno…I can write with both my hands. I can also stand on my head for thirty minutes straight and—"

_Now you've done it…_

He started laughing. Of course he was laughing, I sounded like a moron. I blushed furiously, though…I was enjoying the soft sound of his laugh. "Thirty minutes huh? Doesn't that get tiring?"

I sighed quietly, knowing he was only humoring me. He was probably thinking what an idiot I was, blushing like crazy around him. Probably thinking I was some kind of twisted little kid.

_Though I really do feel like one…_

"S-sure it does, but I'm really into gymnastics so it's not so hard…"

He actually seemed interested then, "Oh yeah? Can you do flips and shit?"

I couldn't help but smile, he got me into my field of talking, and when I wanted to talk I didn't stop. "Yeah! I once did three back flips in a row. I like doing back walkovers too, though I usually practice on my trampoline. Some people just say I'm hyper as all hell but I just like to keep moving, ya know? That's never a bad thing, it helps me stay in shape and feel good."

Sparkling eyes blinked twice at me when I was done talking and I realized I probably should have slowed down, I must have confused him.

Though the next thing I knew he just laughed and rested his chin in his hands. "So I didn't catch your name, Brownie."

I titled my head, confused for a moment then smiling at the sudden like of the nickname. It felt right and…flattering. "I'm Sora, but…you can call me Brownie if you want." I threw in a laugh at the end for good measure.

_If this isn't flirting then I don't know what is…_

Though it's not like the boy wasn't flirting back…

"Alright, Brownie. I'm Riku. Let me know if you think of a nickname for me, hmm?" That smirk had to be illegal. I was either about to melt or ascend into heaven.

I said nothing, just nodded stupidly.

"So I saw you ripping up that paper earlier today, what was that about?"

I shrugged, not even feeling worried about that stupid test anymore. "Bad grade, I…couldn't stand looking at it anymore I guess." I was starting to talk normally around him at least.

"Ha, a bad grade, huh? Is that really such a big deal?" he asked, sounding more like he was really _wondering_ the question, relying on my answer.

I shook my head. "To my parents yeah, so I guess it has to be for me…"

Riku leaned his head onto his left hand, making a soft hmming sound when…

"Sora!"

_Kairi…_

"There's the girlfriend, right on cue." Riku looked up as Kairi approached our table from behind. I could tell she was angry, but I felt like her reasons were totally unjust. I mean I was in the middle of a conversation…the woman didn't _control_ me.

Soon enough she was standing right next to me, already urging me up. "I thought you were just getting a drink, everyone's waiting for you to get back…" She threw a sideways glare towards Riku, which frankly, really pissed me off, then added, "Oh and Demyx is throwing a party at his house on Saturday, and it's a sleep over so bring that one pink pillow, okay?"

I about wanted to slap her hand off of me. The first time I ever thought of laying a hand on Kairi and it was because of some boy I just met…

_Something's wrong here…something's happening. _

"I've got to get to study hall; guess I'll chat with ya later, Brownie." Riku did a two finger salute before sitting up, sticking his hands in his baggy jean pockets and exiting the lunch room.

Once he was gone I seemed to "come back to Earth" if that makes any sense.

Kairi's confused and almost angry stare helped with that. "What the hell was that all about?"

I thought of a lie quickly, "He wanted to know where the study hall was." I stood up quickly, my legs feeling funny and my head feeling light.

_If just talking to him does this to me I wonder what doing—_

"Sora, he called you _Brownie_. And you two were laughing at something, spill it." Kairi actually seemed mad.

I had to play it cool. "No he didn't, and we talked for a little bit. I am allowed to be his friend, aren't I?"

She narrowed her eyes at me, catching on quickly like she always did with me. "I don't like him, Sora. He's bad news. What if you're on his list now? Or even me?"

"His…list?" I asked, somewhat confused and insulted at the same time.

"You know how most kids like that have hit lists? The boy looks like he's killed people before, Sora."

I suddenly couldn't stand Kairi's voice anymore. I just met a sweet kid and the first thing she spits out about him is that he's some kind of murderer? I was seriously done with her childish acting.

"Did he look like he was about to slit my throat? Get over yourself, Kairi! He's just a kid who wants to fit in. Its people like you that make him the way he is! I'm sick of people treating others differently because of where they come from or what they did or even how they look. And I won't just sit back and listen to you say things like that!"

Kairi hadn't moved since I started talking, it was then I noticed that we were close enough for our whole table of friends to hear my little rant. I slowly looked from her astonished face back to the table and my heart about burst out of my chest.

_Oh no… _

"I…I…" The stares were too much…the way she looked at me made me want to vomit. "I've got to go." As soon as the last syllable left my mouth I was already booking it towards the doors, yet their stares still stayed, imprinted in the back of my mind.

And it was then that I knew my life would never be the same again.

I had to thank my lucky stars that it was Friday and I didn't have to go back to school for another two days. I had time to think, sort out my thoughts and consider all the possibilities. It was the end of the day and I was practically running home. No way was I staying another second there. My phone vibrated in my pocket for the hundredth time in the past few hours. I was terrified to look at it. I just knew there would be texts from everyone, wondering what had gotten into me. And especially Kairi.

_What am I going to say to her? How will I explain myself…?_

It wasn't going to be easy, that much was for sure. I yelled and insulted her in front of all our friends and for what? A boy I had just met. I threw reality in her face without even questioning my reasoning and for what? A boy I had just met.

That boy I had only just met…he had yet to get out of my head either.

I didn't understand.

Not one bit.

I threw my book bag onto my bed and fell into the warmth. My back felt so sore and I let myself relax, trying to forget the day away.

Until my twin brother, Vanitas poked his head into the room, smirking at me.

"How was your day, _Sooooora_?" he walked right in, not even bothering to ask if it was okay.

I sighed and threw a pillow over my head. "Leave me alone…" I mumbled.

"Dude, I've got something to ask you."

"I'm not lending you anymore munny. Go find someone else." He had come to me almost three times that week and asked for some change. I didn't know what he needed it for; I was pretty sure he was lying when he said it was for school.

"Sora, this is serious."

I sat up and stared at him, raising my eyebrow. "What?"

"I need you to tell the rents that I'm sleeping at Ven's tonight. Okay?"

So if it wasn't begging for money, it was having me lie…that was just like Vanitas.

"What are you really going to be doing…?" I asked slowly, picking at my finger nails thoughtfully.

He wagged his finger at me. "I'm. Not. Telling." Golden eyes sparkled and he grinned at me then bounded into the hallway, yelling, "Thank you, awesome brother of mine!"

I sighed when I heard the front door open and close. Even my evil brother was going out this weekend…I was stuck at home to ponder my horrid life.

My phone lit up. I glared at it and threw it across the room. It landed in a pile of dirty clothes that had been there for ages it seemed. My head went straight into my hands and my chest suddenly felt so tight.

Why had I said those things I did…? Everyone was so confused…but probably not as confused as I was. It wasn't fair! I was the one with the crisis on my hands! It's not like they were confused about their sexuality…

But was I really…?

I couldn't even find an answer for my main question.

And that was truly saddening…

"I've never felt this depressed before…" I said out loud, remembering about my test and how that had set my day off for failure.

I covered my eyes with my arm and held back tears. It wouldn't do me any good to cry over my situation…but it seemed like the simplest thing to do at that point.

So I ended up crying myself into a quiet slumber.

My eyes slowly opened and I realized I'd been asleep for almost three hours. It was already seven. I yawned loudly, stretching my arms over my head. From across the room I saw a small light in the darkness that was my room. Squinting, it only took me seconds to realize what it was.

My stupid phone.

Were people really still trying to contact me…?

I swallowed some spit that tasted salty and walked over to the phone. I glared down at it and blinked a few times, realizing the name on it said "Axel."

_Axel's calling me…?_

I instantly grabbed the phone and answered it. Maybe this was finally my lucky break! I could talk to Axel about my problems…maybe he would understand. Maybe…it was true, the thought I had about him and Roxas.

_I just have to try…_

**"—ah! Just shut the fuck up, alri—oh shit, Sora, you actually answered? Well whudoyano!"** I could practically see his cheeky grin in my head as he continued talking without a response from me, **"People have been like, seriously worried about ya. Kairi just insisted that I call you a hundred times because obviously her calls weren't working. Would have never guessed that you'd pick me over your pretty little girlfriend. I must be pretty damn special, huh?"**

**"IS THAT SORA?!"** I also heard that shout shortly after Axel finished speaking.

That…was definitely Kairi.

Kairi…she was with Axel? Why…?

"**Calm yer tits, chicky. Let me talk to him first, he still hasn't even said anything, you might just scare the kid."**

"**WHY THE HELL WOULD I SCARE MY OWN BOYFRIEND?!"**

"**My…uhhh…point exactly…?" **

"**UGH! Just…give me the phone when you're done…"** She started talking again but it was muffled, I guessed there were others there as well.

I took a deep breath and wanted to speak but couldn't find the words. I was suddenly mute, and that was really strange…for me at least. Usually I was the one who broke awkward silences with my goofy jokes or acrobatics.

It…wasn't like me to have nothing to say.

"**Aye, Sora? You there?"**

I nodded and sniffed. "Yeah, I uh…Axel?"

"**Right here, kiddo."**

"Could you maybe…go somewhere where, uhm…Kairi isn't going to hear or listen…?"

He was silent for a moment, I pictured him looking back at my redheaded girlfriend and then to a door of some sort. **"Uhh…what Sora…? Couldn't really hear you, the reception in this coffee house is just awful. I'm gunna step outside."**

I blinked, confused because I was certain that he had heard me.

I heard a door open and then he spoke again. **"Alright, now what is it that you wanna talk about?"**

Oh…he was just making sure Kairi didn't suspect anything. Of course. Axel was a smart guy.

I took a deep breath and tried to center my words in my head then started speaking softly, just in case my mother or anyone else was home. "Okay well I really want you…to take me seriously. Is that...okay?"

"**Cross my heart. I'll be as serious as my demeanor allows." **

I smiled a little and continued, "This is kind of really hard for me to talk about and say and…just, well, everything, so I'm just going to come right out and say it…so please don't laugh, okay?"

"**I won't."**

"…" My hands were shaking. I was…really scared. "Axel…are…are you…do you like…guys?"

He burst out laughing.

I felt like such a failure.

_I want to sink into the floor and never resurface…_

My finger was itching for the cancel button on the phone as Axel just kept laughing. Tears were in my eyes. I couldn't…take this anymore.

"**Okay, okay, okay, oh god. I'm so sorry, Sora. I really didn't mean to laugh, honest I didn't. Please don't be offended. Hey, you still there?"**

"…Yes…" I bit my lip and blinked out a tear.

"**Okay, so," **he cleared his throat; a small laugh came out with it as well.** "I'm not laughing at **_**you**_**, Sora." **

That seemed hard to believe seeing as how he erupted into laughter at just a sentence from my mouth…

"**Honestly, I'm just laughing because the way you asked and…and how you honestly haven't noticed it yet! Almost everyone knows I'm bisexual. You really are as dense as they say, eh shortie?"**

I narrowed my eyes at the phone but then…I processed what he had said.

He…he _did_! He really did like guys! That meant that I could talk to him about what I was feeling! Maybe he would even explain why I was feeling like this and what to do about it. I felt suddenly so happy my tears stopped instantly.

"Axel! You…you've gotta help me!"

"**You're in love with me, aren't you?"**

My eyes went wide and I shook my head violently, even though he couldn't see these gestures. "No, no…I…"

"**Is it…holy shit, that silver haired transfer kid…?"**

My heart suddenly started beating at lightning speed. He hadn't even said his name and already I was on the verge of fainting or…whatever it was that girls did over hot guys.

I could tell he got the idea by my sudden silence.

"**You're…being serious, right?"**

"I wouldn't joke about this, Axel."

He sighed, probably ran his fingers through his spiky red hair like he usually did. **"I guess you always did give off that gay kind of vibe. It was bound to happen sooner or later."**

"What do I do? Is this going to be permanent…? Axel, he's all I can think about! I'm losing my mind, I don't even know if I like Kairi anymore or if I could even stand to kiss her or, or even look at her now…please, Axel. You're my only hope…"

There was a long pause from the other end. I felt like maybe he had already given up on me. Maybe I was asking way too much of him. Maybe I had already embarrassed him enough. Maybe…he didn't even want to—

"**I'll be over with Roxas in fifteen minutes. Be ready."**

My mouth dropped open.

_He…what…?_

"**Sora? You hear me?"**

"Y-yeah."

"**I'll see you soon." **

And he hung up.

I was confused out of my mind…What did he need to come over my house for…? Was this really that big of a deal? Okay, so that was a dumb question. Of course it was. I guess Axel really did care and he did want to help me for whatever reason. I felt so…thankful.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey guys! I'm back! I got a few things to say. Well first off, this story might be kind of random and crazy. Also, I'm super into other pairings, like I ship almost _everyone_ together in KH. Yaoi, I'm saying. I'm totally against almost all heterosexual-ness with these guys. So, honestly, there MIGHT be a bit of I dunno...Axel/Sora, or even Roxas/Sora. But that is just a warning! Just so everyone knows how my crazy brain works, haha! But besides for that, just let me know what you guys think! Hope you like this chapter! Even though you'll probably feel real bad for poor Sora :C**

* * *

-Vindicated-

It'd been sixteen minutes and Axel hadn't shown up yet. I was beginning to think he was just joking.

_But why would he…? _

What would be the point? To laugh at me? He did that enough as it was.

I paced the front door, eyeing my mother a few times. Only because she was eyeing me back.

"Sora? Why don't you sit down. Your friends will be here any minute, I'm sure."

The motherly woman smiled at me as she cooked something in a pot. I had already forgotten what she said she was making.

I shook my head fervently. "I can't sit down. Not right now."

She got the idea then and just nodded. I figured she knew me well enough by now. I never stood still when I was told.

I began skipping, back and forth until the door hit me in the face.

"Oww!" I yelled, reeling backwards.

Axel's head popped into view along with a large grin. "Sora? The hell're you doing?"

"Cradling my noes…" I said angrily, doing just that.

He laughed loudly and nodded over to my mother. "Hey, Sora's mom! What's for dinner? I'm starving!"

Of course Axel walked right over to my mother and swooned her with his good looks and…I was going to say charm, but he really didn't even have any of that. So he just swooned her with his looks.

"Oh awesome, I love chili!" he exclaimed as I let Roxas in as well.

"I'm glad, Axel. Maybe you should come over more often." She winked and I cringed.

"Ugh mom! Please…" My head was starting to hurt; I just wanted both of them in my room so we could actually talk about the situation.

"Sora's just being a prude," Axel said while walking over to me, wrapping one long arm around my shoulders. "Not like you at all, Mrs. S."

"I always tell you, Axel. Just call me Susan." She giggled and I wanted to throw up.

"Uhhh, mom? We're gunna go upstairs. Just uh…let us know when the food is ready." I hurriedly pushed Axel's back towards the stairs, my mom telling us to have fun and don't be too loud and yada yada…

When we were all sitting down on the floor I clung to my Moogle plushy. I even slept with the thing…even though it was really childish and girly.

"So!" Axel exclaimed, sitting Indian style just like Roxas and I. "I just wanna start out by saying that Sora's mom is really hot."

"AXEL!"

"Axel…"

Roxas was a little less surprised, but I was steaming. "I thought you were here to—"

"I know, fudge cakes. It was just a joke. Calm down." Axel put a finger to my lip and I did calm. "Let's get to the crisis on hand, shall we? Sora, please start by telling us both how you're feeling. Take all the time you need."

He suddenly sounded like a therapist and I was suddenly really nervous. How was I actually going to talk face to face to two of my good friends about something like this…? Wasn't this something you were supposed to figure out on your own…? Was it really even that big of a deal? Was I just overreacting? Did they even need to be here? What if I—

"Soraaa? You in there?" Axel tapped on my head and Roxas scolded him.

"Let the kid think, Axe," he said quietly, maybe not to disturb me. "Sora? Just remember. We're your friends and we want to help you. Or else we wouldn't be here. Alright?"

I nodded slowly, biting my lip and squeezing the life out of my Moogle.

_I just have to talk. Close my eyes if I have to. Axel and Roxas are here to listen and to help…I know that._

Taking a deep breath I finally started to speak. "It's…it's all that guys fault! Ever since I saw him in the lunch room when Axel told me he was looking at me. Ever since then it's like everything has been flipped upside down and I can't figure out which way is right anymore! I feel like…he's the most gorgeous…person I have ever seen. Kairi doesn't even compare…and I feel bad saying that! Why would I be saying that? Why am I? I don't like guys. I shouldn't like guys. It's not even possible so maybe this is just some weird phase..." I trailed off and set my eyes on the ground, too afraid to look at my friends.

Axel spoke first. "Would you kiss him?"

My face flushed bright pink. "What?!"

"You heard me."

"Maybe he doesn't want to answer that, Axel." Roxas glared at the redhead.

He just smirked. "Yeah well, I'm just trying to help. You want help don't you Sora?"

I swallowed and nodded. "Of course…"

"So answer the question."

My hands were shaking again. My heart was beating loudly. I'd never felt this nervous before. "I…I dunno. Maybe…if he…if he tried to kiss me then maybe I—"

"Okay, well the whole doki doki thing you got going on here is definitely telling me you're head over heels for this dude. You'd kiss him given the opportunity you're saying, right?"

I nodded again, too consumed in my own embarrassment to even reply.

"Kay. Now. Would you kiss me?"

Roxas growled and I gasped. I was about to ask "WHAT?!" even louder, but the opportunity escaped me.

"Axel, you're going too far."

"I'm trying to fucking help the kid; get off my back, Rox!"

"_No_! You're trying to sexually harass him!"

"Am not. I usually only do that to you."

"Cut it out, Axel."

"Not until I help him the way I want to. He asked _me_ for help, not you, blondie."

Roxas groaned and crossed his arms, looking away from us both. "Fine."

"I'll ask this again, and with no interruptions this time. Would you kiss me?"

I shrugged, his eyes were glued onto me. "I don't know!"

"Does the thought disgust you?" he asked.

"…No. It's not disgusting…"

"So you would?"

"I'm not saying that!"

"Just…close your eyes for a sec."

"AXEL!"

Before Roxas' pleas could stop Axel from doing it, his lips were forced onto mine. My eyes went as wide as saucers and my face was burning hot. His eyes were so green up close, narrowed just slightly; I could feel his lips in a soft grin. It was quick and he pulled back in a few seconds, Roxas was clawing at his back.

"_What was that_?!"

"Look! He does the same damn thing you do!" Axel was pointing at me and laughing while trying to subdue the cat-like Roxas.

"What does THAT mean?!"

"Would you just—STOP and _look at him_!" Axel yelled, using his whole hand to gesture to me then.

Roxas stopped and he did look at me, which just made my already beat red face go even brighter. I was about to explode.

_I…actually had…guy's lips…on mine._

For some reason, just looking at me made the blond stop his vicious acts on Axel.

"He's fucking red as a strawberry. You ever see him blush like that when Kairi kisses him?" Axel suggested, eyeing Roxas from beside him.

The smaller boy stayed silent and just shook his head.

"Of course not. Cause he's as gay as a fucking rainbow. I'm surprised it took this long to figure out."

I was about to retaliate but instead my mouth just opened and I made a really stupid sounding noise.

"My point…" Axel narrowed his eyes and sat down fully, crossing his arms. "Sora, you need to break up with Kairi. It's not fair to you or her from this point on. I'm sure this transfer dude will totally wanna fuck you anyways."

Roxas hit Axel on the head.

I stayed silent once again.

"Shit, Rox! I'm only telling the truth!"

"Stop acting like such an…such a—"

"Such a what, Roxas?"

"Such a douchebag!"

"Oh get the stick out of your ass. You're just jealous because I kissed Sora."

"OH YEAH RIGHT!"

"Why don't you kiss him too? I wouldn't mind watching."

"Are you insane?!"

"Uhh…guys…?" I finally found my voice and they both turned to me, blue eyes angry and green ones expecting. "I think we…we might be being a bit too loud…"

Roxas huffed. "Well if this guy wasn't being a total dickhead."

"My apologies, princess butt hurt."

"Are…you two dating…?" I asked finally. My face was still red…but I could at least think a bit clearer now.

Axel was laughing and Roxas was still facing the other direction, away from both me and Axel. "I wouldn't really call it dating. He just likes to come over for sex sometimes."

"Axel I am going to fucking kill you…"

"Whenever you're ready, sweetheart, lemme know."

"But you two…you guys kiss…and stuff…? Like at school…?" I asked slowly.

I saw Roxas' eyes avert to the floor but Axel answered. "Yeah, sure. As long as he lets me. Only ever had sex a couple times at school though. Such a bummer!" Axel laughed again and Roxas at this point was staying silent. But I could see his face blushing.

Mine was too though so it's not like he was alone. Axel was really an upfront kind of guy. Of course I had noticed this before, but it was just so…obvious now.

"Axel…you really think that I'm…that I'm…" I couldn't say it. It was too embarrassing and painful.

"Kid…" he put his hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes. "You act like a little school girl when you talk about silver hair, you blush like crazy when I kiss you, and you said it yourself. You think he's _gorgeous_. What more proof do you need?"

I looked from him to Roxas, who was still glaring at the ground.

Tears bubbled in my eyes.

"But Axel…" They flowed softly down my cheeks and into my mouth. "What's going to happen to me…? Everyone will hate me. Kairi will hate me. How will I tell my mom? How do I deal with this…?"

This time, Roxas came up to me, placing his hand in mine he stared into my eyes thoughtfully. "You're gunna be fine, Sora, trust me." For some reason, even though Roxas usually made fun of me at school and joked around a lot, at that moment all I wanted to do was believe every word he said. "You don't have to tell your parents any time soon. So just put that off for now. Your friends will be fine. Obviously we don't hate you at all or ever will. I really don't think anyone could really hate you, Sora. Kairi will be upset for a while, but that isn't your fault. She'll get over it and end up being your friend again, I promise you that. And…dealing with it will come easily enough. Just accept it. Don't push it off or try to pretend you're something you're not or you'll be miserable. We like you for who you are. So just…be you, okay?"

I was bawling at that point and I instantly let go of my Moogle and clung to Roxas. I cried over his shoulder and he slowly rubbed my back. All of my emotions poured out like they usually did when I cried. I was kind of an emotional person, so this was a normal thing for me. Though I don't really think either of them has seen me cry this badly.

I think Axel began soothing me as well, rubbing my shoulder next to Roxas' hand.

They really did care…I knew they did. And they did help me…the only problem I had was actually…doing and remembering everything they told me.

For some reason it all seemed so much more complicated than it really was.

Axel and Roxas stayed for dinner but left shortly afterwards. The redhead was intentionally flirting with my mother and even Roxas seemed more embarrassed than I was. So to save him from further torment, I instantly lead them to the door.

"Remember what we talked about, Sora." Axel smiled at me.

I rolled my eyes a bit, as if I could really forget anything that was said in my room that night.

I turned to Roxas and nodded my head a bit. "Thank you. Both of you."

Roxas tilted his head a bit but smiled shortly after. "We'll see you on Monday, Sora."

They left and I was alone with my heavy heart once again.

"That Axel is such a charmer," my mother said while I stood in front of the door, almost unable to let my friends go.

I sighed. "He's nineteen, mom."

"Nineteen and in highschool?" she asked shocked.

"I guess he got held back a year or two…" I said slowly, still staring at the door.

"Well, if he was a few years older…"

"I'm gunna tell dad!" I yelled.

"Sora, sweetie, I'm joking. You tell Axel thank you for being such a gentleman tonight for me, alright?"

That was a funny thought. Me thanking Axel for being a gentleman. The guy kissed me without any consent just before he spouted nonsense to my mother. Sighing again I nodded and was about to ascend the stairs when she spoke again.

"Hon? Where is your brother tonight?"

I felt a little bad for lying but I did anyway. "He went to Ventus' house. I'm going to bed."

"Your father won't be home till next week, Sora!"

"Okay…"

My room seemed empty without them. My heart felt empty without Kairi. Knowing that I was going to have to break up with her…it hurt. She was one of my best friends. I still wanted her around. I wanted her there when I needed someone to talk to. It wasn't like I wanted to just…drop her for…for the transfer student or anything…

She was probably cursing my name as I spoke.

Sleep was the only thing that I actually welcomed.

* * *

The next few days passed by quickly. I ignored my phone besides for when Axel or Roxas would text or call. Of course I wanted to talk to them. They understood me and accepted everything I had to offer. It was comforting to just send messages to them.

Sunday afternoon Axel asked me to go out with them.

**"Let's just get you out of that house, peanut. It'll be good for you. And don't worry; I haven't even spoken to Kairi yet. That's all you."**

I nodded to myself and said, "Where will we go?"

**"Ice cream of course! Roxas is such a fucking fiend. I'll pay too."**

Again I nodded but added a small smile. "Okay. That sounds fun."

**"We'll be there to pick you up in ten."**

When he reached my house he had the small blond in tote, grinning as usual. "Hope you like sea salt, Sora."

"Of course I do. Roxas used to buy boxes of them and he'd share them with me on summer days," I said smiling brightly at the blond.

He blushed a little. "Yeah like, two years ago…"

"Still! I always liked those days. We don't hang out enough anymore." I quickly latched my arm around Axel's, just as Roxas' was, and we started off to our destination.

Roxas spoke softly to me, "So…let's hang out more then."

I grinned to myself and both of them. "Thanks for this, guys. I needed out of that house anyways."

"Yeah, we kind of figured," Axel laughed a little, putting his hands in his pockets.

"Where are we getting ice cream?" I asked happily.

"The station," Roxas said.

"Are we gunna go up to the clock tower?!" I tried to control my bouncing but it didn't work too well.

The redhead ruffled my hair. "God Sora, you're adorable."

"Well _are_ we?" I asked again.

"Yeah. Of course." Roxas grabbed my hand in his and we walked like that until we reached the clock tower.

The three of us were quiet and peaceful as we stared at the setting sun. My ice cream was dripping all over my legs but it didn't bother me much. I was too consumed in the scene laid out on front of me. I never wanted the moment to end. I never wanted to have to think about my school life or…or how I was maybe possibly…homosexual…

I shook my head, smiling to fear my frown away. "I want to do this a lot more, okay?" I didn't look at either of them but I'm sure they heard me.

"Axel and I do this almost every day. Sometimes Demyx even comes. You're welcome to join us, Sora…"

"As long as Roxas doesn't end up getting too jealous…" Axel said slyly.

I turned to him. "Hu…?" He reached over and used a gloved finger to lap up some ice cream that had landed on my inner thigh. He then placed that finger in his mouth.

Roxas' face was almost as stunned as mine.

"Oh come on, kiddos! Let's not be killjoys."

"Stop being such a pervert and maybe we wouldn't have to feel this way!" Roxas exclaimed, slapping Axel.

"Maybe Sora should start wearing shorter shorts!" he laughed heartily, swatting Roxas' hand away.

I instantly pulled my shorts down, blushing feverishly.

"Roxas! Yours is melting too! You're getting it all over me!"

"Well I'm not gunna _lick it up_!"

"Awe, damn…what a letdown."

Roxas groaned and sat back down, slurping up the rest of his ice cream.

I smiled even through my blushing. These guys…were my friends. My true, true friends. I was so happy.

"I'm so happy…" I voiced, staring into the last rays of the setting sun. They both stopped suddenly and looked towards me. "I'm…so very happy…" My eyes filled with tears but I didn't let them fall. I was way too happy to be crying.

"Don't cry, Sora…" Roxas said.

I shook my head and smiled. "I'm not gunna. I promise."

Axel was quiet. So was Roxas.

And the sun set on yet another day. It felt like any other. But this one was…different. It would set into a day that would change so much, so quickly.

* * *

Waking up was really hard. Not just because of how sleepy I was. But because of the dream I had…

All I remember was a lot of silver and…kissing. It was almost just like Axel's kiss. But…so much…hotter and faster. It wasn't something I wanted to think about…or maybe it _was_ because the more I did the warmer my body became and the more I wanted it to actually happen.

_What's wrong with me…?_

I forced myself up and began to get dressed for school. I stopped suddenly though and remembered that I hadn't even said a word to Kairi since I yelled at her on Friday…

_She's…going to be expecting this big explanation and I won't be able to give her…anything._

My heart was thumping as I pulled on a yellow tank top, layering it with a smaller blue one. After that came my signature red shorts and my crown necklace that I wouldn't go a day without wearing.

In the mirror I looked fine…but inside I felt like my life was going to fail me. Or maybe…I would fail my life.

As I walked to school, Vanitas stopped me, asking me for a couple of dollars that I didn't even have. "I'm all out of munny, Van…" I told him, slightly sympathetic for letting my brother down.

"Then how about you just walk with me real quick?" he asked, eyeing me up and down.

I narrowed my eyes slightly, "What for?"

He grabbed my arm and began pulling me towards the back of school, into some woods. The smell of cigarettes instantly hit me and I crinkled my nose. I was never one for the smell since my father was a chain smoker.

My dark blue haired brother walked me up to a few kids in a small circle and smiled, saying, "This is him. We look a lot alike, yeah?"

They all set their eyes on me and I flushed slowly. "He's cute," one of them said.

"How cooperative is he?" another asked, touching a piece of my hair.

I backed away slightly and glared at Vanitas. "Van…what's going on?"

"Look, if you do what they say, then I'll get my weed."

"What?! You mean drugs?" I shouted.

A boy slapped a hand over my mouth. "He sure is loud, eh?"

They all laughed and I narrowed my eyes, trying to fight the boy off of me. "Let me go!" I yelled. "Van, you don't really do drugs, do you?" I asked, pleading with my brother. I had never heard of anything like this from him. It was upsetting and entirely heartbreaking.

"Oh like no one else smokes weed, Sora. Calm down, you're embarrassing me," he scoffed, spitting on the ground.

"I'm gunna tell mom!" I closed my eyes and shouted at the ground. There were hands around both my arms.

Vanitas walked up towards me and put a finger under my chin, forcing it up so I had to see his eyes. "You do that and I'll tell her you're gay."

My eyes were watering.

_How…would he even know that…? _

"You guys can take him. Just give me my shit, aiight?"

_Would he really…do that…?_

I heard a few noises in my ears but I couldn't register what they were. My eyes were wide and glaring at a small ant hill on the forest floor. I watched as the ants went in and out of their small home. I suddenly wished I had never left mine.

"Just don't bruise him or anything. My mom will ask shit and I don't want anything slipping up." Vanitas was walking away from me.

My hand wanted to go up towards him. I wanted to reach for his hand and beg him to take me home. He didn't even turn around.

I was crying my eyes out as a brown haired boy took my shirt off and began touching me inappropriately.

I screamed and someone used some tape for my mouth so the only noises I could make were squeaks and moans.

This was the worst. This was the absolute worse.

I knew that Vanitas was evil…but I never would have pictured him doing something like this…

"He's even cuter than Vanitas. If we had more time…"

"I wanna play with him a little…"

"Stop hogging 'im!"

Hands traveled over my stomach and I shivered, feeling tears soak the tape around my mouth.

One of them started biting and sucking on my neck. I screamed but heard nothing but a muffled groan. My whole body was on fire, one of them wouldn't stop touching my nipples, squeezing them too hard, too fast, too much.

I hurt and my pants felt tight.

"He's getting hard…the kid really is gay!"

"I bet he wants one of us to fuck him, huh?"

They laughed and I cried.

I cursed Vanitas. I cursed my brother.

_Damn…him._

Suddenly a bell rang and the touching stopped. They stood up and left me on the ground, talking to themselves, laughing like they hadn't just molested anyone. Like it was just a regular day for them. It…was sickening.

I ripped the tape off my mouth and instantly threw up on the ant hill.

_I'm sorry ants…_

Somehow I found the strength to put my shirt back on and trudge to the front doors of my school. I went to the bathroom first and began washing off the dirt from my face and stomach. A few people walked in and glared at me I felt like this wasn't even happening…at least, I didn't want to accept it.

My neck was littered with red marks and I tried to scrub them away, as if that would do anything.

_They're hickeys…I've never even had one before this…_

In fact…I'd never even been touched like that before…not by anyone.

My head was pounding and my heart ached. My eyes wouldn't stop leaking fluid. I felt like running home. But what good would that do? My mom would ask why I was skipping and she would see the marks.

_Vanitas will tell her I'm…gay…I can't deal with that. I won't be able to…_

I cried softly as I walked to my homeroom, it felt as if there were bricks in my shoes. It was almost impossible; I was so close to just sitting outside of the building until school let out…

Of course the first person who saw me was Kairi.

_How did I forget she was in my homeroom…?_

I guess there was just too much on my mind.

She looked at me once and then instantly turned her head, making sure that her friends wouldn't look towards me.

I felt my heart twinge with pain as I slumped into my seat. It was against the wall and so I put my head against it. It was nice to feel how cold it was, but it didn't ease the rest of my pain. Probably nothing would do that…

Math was slow and painful as my head would not stop its pounding and I had to ask to use the bathroom twice to throw up the rest of what I had eaten for breakfast. By history my mouth tasted like acid and the seat next to me was empty. Kairi was sitting in the front row, next to her friends. I suddenly missed Axel and Roxas more than anything in the whole world.

Lunch time was the only thing that had me hoping.

My eyes lit up when I saw Axel's smiling face. Kairi was sitting by Namine, Olette and Selphie. She was a decent enough ways away from Axel and Roxas which I was thankful for.

As I approached the two their expressions quickly changed.

When I sat down Roxas spoke softly, "Sora…what the hell happened to your—"

"Can we move to another table…?" I asked, looking at the ground.

They nodded and we moved.

My heart beat so loudly I thought they could hear it.

"Sora, you've got some major fucking hickeys…" Axel said.

I was crying again. I couldn't speak.

"Did you already go at it with silver hair?"

I shook my head and they both looked at each other. They turned serious in a second.

"Sora, what happened?" Roxas moved and sat next to me, holding my hand in one of his.

Axel was leaning across the table, waiting for me to speak.

"I…I can't…" I didn't even know what I was going to say.

"Someone did this to you…someone forced you into this…" Axel growled and slammed a fist on the table. "Who the fuck did it? Just tell us, Sora and we'll kill them."

I shook my head quickly. "You can't!"

_Vanitas will tell…he will tell my mom…_

"Why?" Roxas asked.

I just kept shaking my head. "No…no…"

Axel sat up and punched the wall.

A teacher ran over to him and he shoved her off. I could see his knuckles bleeding.

I just knew everyone at our table was looking at us. Looking at me. Looking at the hickeys. Judging me. Thinking things. Thinking wrong things. Knowing lies.

Suddenly he was there too. His eyes weren't hard though like the ones at the table. They were soft and kind and…gorgeous as I remembered.

"Brownie…?"


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Well that took forever. Sorry, I started reading Zemyx fanfiction...ugh, I feel the need to write one now. Maybe I'll throw them in this story somehow! Cause they are just too awesome for words. Anyways! Hope you enjoy this chapterrr. Let me know your thoughts and things in the review section and you all have a wonderful day! :]  
**

* * *

"What's wrong with him?"

"It's not your problem; we've got it under control."

"Axel…he's just trying to help."

"Yeah well, he doesn't have any business helping. He's not friends with Sora like we are. So—"

"Let me take him to the nurse at least."

"If anyone's taking him to the nurse its gunna be me or Roxas!"

I stood up and almost fell over, Riku's hand caught me slightly and I froze instantly, regretting even moving. His hand was so warm…I didn't want it to leave me.

"Sora, are you alright?" Axel was beside me, trying to force Riku off of me.

"Dude, I've got it. Sora's going to be fine."

"You don't even know him! Don't touch him!"

The next thing I knew Axel took a swing and punched Riku in the jaw. My heart dropped into my stomach as the whole lunch room became silent. I saw blood spurt from the side of Riku's mouth and his eyes became fiery. He looked at me for a slip second and then he punched Axel right back. Soon the two were fighting each other almost like something you'd see in a movie.

_And it's all because of me…stupid me…_

Teachers surrounded the two, trying to pull them apart, a whistle blew and the whole lunch room was chanting and surrounding our table. I clung to Roxas who looked so upset. Like he was about to jump in and fight them both as well.

I couldn't possible handle seeing that…

"S—…Please stop!" I yelled, eyes closed and tears sweltering.

Both Axel and Riku looked at me with blazing eyes and my heart was throbbing.

"Stop…both of you…" Roxas glared at them from beside me and then started walking away from the table with me, his arms around my shoulders.

With my back turned to both of them I slouched over and sobbed into Roxas. He walked me towards the doors and sat me down on a bench outside of the lunch room. I cried and cried. It felt so strange to be crying like this in a place like school. People walked by, glancing at me and the blond. I just wished I wasn't in such a public place. It wasn't fair…

"Sora…?" Roxas' voice startled me a bit but I picked my head up and looked at him. He spoke slowly, rubbing his fingers through my hair. "Are you okay?"

"I've…never seen Axel so angry…" I hiccupped a little and rubbed my eyes.

Roxas sighed and glanced out a window. "It was kind of a shock to me, too."

"He hit Riku…Riku hit him too…it's all my fault that they're hurt…"

"No…no its not, Sora. That's Axel's fault for starting it. He…didn't have to say those things he did. And he sure as hell didn't have to punch the other guy."

I breathed slowly but tears threatened my eyes once again. "Kairi hates me…"

"Then that's her loss."

"Axel…and Riku are going to be in trouble…"

"Knowing Axel he won't get off so bad. And Riku was just defending himself. It'll be alright."

Roxas sounded so confident in everything. It made me jealous. Why couldn't I be more like him…? Why was I reduced to a pile of mush when he was so calm and collected?

I started crying again, even though I really hadn't stopped in the first place. My face was buried in Roxas' jacket when I heard the voices.

"—nothing! He barged up to our table acting all high and mighty. It's his own fault!"

"My fault? I didn't even do anything to you!"

"You should have backed off when I told you to."

"Both of you quiet down and follow me to the principal's office!"

I glanced up and saw Riku and Axel following behind a large woman who looked abnormally pissed off. My eyes connected with each of theirs for a moment. The silver haired boy looked upset but legitimately sorry. Axel just looked angry, but his eyes softened slightly when he saw me.

I wanted to follow them too. I needed to. It was because of me that they were getting into trouble. Maybe I could help them out of it somehow.

My body jumped up and Roxas' hand shot out for my wrist.

"Sora…" His eyes were narrowed, blue crystals shining.

"I have…to go with them…"

With his mouth slightly parted and his eyes still narrowed he turned his head from me, sighed angrily and let me go.

I gave him the best smile I could muster and took off towards Axel and Riku.

The three of us sat in the office; I was twiddling my thumbs nervously while Riku and Axel just lounged in their chairs beside me. Axel was even putting his feet up on a side table. I noticed that his lip was bleeding and his chin had a cut on it, Riku's face looked almost identical.

When the principle entered the room neither Axel nor Riku moved but I straightened my posture.

His eyes were narrowed and he sat down with a very stern aura.

_Oh please don't let him yell…I hate yelling…_

"Would one of you mind explaining to me why the lunch room was erupted into a frenzy?"

I felt the need to speak, so I did. "It was all my fault, sir!"

All three of them looked at me incredulously. I closed my eyes and continued. "If it wasn't for me then Riku and Axel wouldn't have even started the fight. So…maybe you could just punish me and then let them off the hook?"

The last part of my sentence I regretted because it didn't sound formal enough. They still stared at me and my face couldn't have been redder, not even if Axel kissed me again.

Finally, Riku spoke slowly. "It was actually the redhead's fault, not Sora's. He was the one who instigated the fight. If he hadn't punched me in the face for no apparent reason—"

"Actually, this silver haired freak was the one who started it." Axel pointed a lazy thumb towards Riku who stiffened and growled slightly.

"Oh, I'm the freak? I'm not the one who punches people out of nowhere!"

"No one even wanted you at that table. Wasn't my fault you pissed me off to the point of violence."

"You're an egotistical maniac."

"You're a pretentious brat!"

"That's_ enough_!"

_Ahhh…he yelled…_

I covered my ears slightly.

"Either you two stop your arguing or you're _both_ going to be suspended!"

The older boys crossed their arms and turned away from the other, angry looks in their eyes.

"I don't really get why or how this started, but apparently the three of you aren't going to tell me the straight story because of how biased you are of each other. So, I guess we will have to settle this simply, with two weeks of after school detention for each of you."

My mouth dropped. "But I—"

"You were not the one who was fighting. You haven't done anything wrong in my eyes. If one of them would like to change that fact…"

They both looked at me then to the principle but said nothing.

Of course they didn't say anything…they didn't want me in trouble too.

"Very well then. I can expect something like this to never happen again. Are we clear?"

I nodded but Axel and Riku just grunted.

"I would like to speak with Riku alone now. So you two are dismissed. Axel I would suggest going to the nurse's office for your lip as well."

The redhead just gave another grunt as he exited the room.

My heart ached slightly. Why would he want to talk to Riku? Was he going to be in more trouble? Was this going to screw up his chances of attending this school?

Though of course I didn't voice any of my questions. I gave Riku a look of apology. He smiled and I melted.

I had almost forgotten that he had the smile of an angel…

Axel didn't go to the nurse's office even though I insisted on him going.

"At least go wash it off in the bathroom! You look like you just came from Fight Club…" I puffed my cheeks slightly and he ruffled my hair.

"You've seen Fight Club?"

"Of course I have…" I figured it was kind of a must-see.

He rolled his eyes as we approached Roxas who was still sitting on the bench.

"Yo." Axel gave him a wave.

Roxas gave him a glare. "Are you in trouble, Sora?" he asked, walking towards me, completely ignoring Axel.

I cleared my throat a little but smiled. "No…but Axel and Riku have a lot of detention…"

"As long as you're not in trouble, that's all that matters."

"Jesus, thanks Rox. Way to let me know you care," Axel said, wiping his nose of some dried blood.

Roxas glared some more. "Way to dig your own shit hole, Axel."

The tension was high and I felt the need to break it.

"At least he isn't getting suspended! The principal threatened it, but I guess it really wasn't that big of a deal! So, at least there's that, right?"

I smiled largely at both of them but it seemed that I had only made things worse.

Roxas spoke angrily, "Let's get to class, Sora. We've got Chem in like two minutes."

I nodded when he took my hand, feeling totally helpless and useless.

* * *

When the end of the day finally rolled around I actually didn't feel so terrible. Being let out of school was one of the most wonderful feelings and today it felt even better. Even though I figured I would just go home and cry alone in my room, at least I didn't have to cry in front of anyone anymore.

I squinted my eyes when I walked outside, using a hand to shield them for a moment. A small smile graced my lips and the breeze was wonderful.

"Sora?"

Axel was running towards me, the backpack around his shoulders hitting his back with each step.

I sighed a little when he reached me. "Hiya."

"You doin' okay, squirt?"

I nodded but shook my head a little too. "Sorta…I guess."

"Let's hang out tonight. We should talk about everything."

"What about Roxas…? And…Riku…"

"Fuck them." He was abrupt with his words, it made me nervous. "Just you and me, alright?"

"But…shouldn't we all talk about everything…maybe…?" It really did feel like everyone should be there to talk…things were confusing enough.

He shook his head and latched onto my arm, pulling me forward.

_I don't get it…_

"Axel…?"

He looked back at me and grinned. "You like cookies? My mom makes the best fucking cookies ever. I'll have her make some fresh ones, alight?"

_I guess I really don't have a choice in the matter…_

When we reached his home he had told his mother to start baking and we resided in his small black room, both sitting on the bed. I felt a little cramped and well…scared. I'd never really even been good friends with Axel before just a few days ago and all of a sudden I was at his house. Not to mention the fact that he was the first boy who had ever…kissed me.

My fingers trailed along my neck, feeling the bumps. I suddenly felt so sick to my stomach.

"Sora, you're gunna tell me who did that, right?"

I shook my head instantly. "I can't, Axel…I really can't."

"And _why_ can't you?"

I sighed and glanced down at my phone which was lighting up.

"Roxas…is calling me," I told him, holding my phone up.

He growled and answered it for me. "Why are you calling Sora?"

I watched as his mood changed drastically from calm and collected to rash and violent.

"Fuck you, Roxas! Sora's here with me, and he's not leaving!" He instantly hung up and I flushed when he threw it onto the bed.

"Why…are you two fighting…? I thought you were dating?" I asked cautiously.

Axel huffed. "Yeah right. I told you, we just fuck sometimes. Apparently he's got a thing for small brunettes anyways." He gave me a strange look.

"Small…brunettes…?" The realization hit me and I almost fell over.

_Roxas likes…ME?!_

"No way…no way…" I shook my head, it was pounding. "But Roxy and I are just friends!"

"Yeah well, it's not fucking hard to see that he likes you. Maybe you're just his friend, but I'm sure he'd suck your dick or whatever if he had the chance."

I wanted to cry again. Not because Roxas liked me, but because everything was just too hard for me to understand. And I hated that.

"Axel…" I felt tears on my eyelids. "Can I have those cookies now…?"

He smiled kindly at me and said, "As many as you'd like, Sora."

Axel and I talked a lot, for almost three hours. We talked about Roxas and Riku. We talked about school and our home lives. We talked about our parents.

But…we didn't talk about anything that had happened earlier that day.

It was starting to get dark out and I was hungry and tired.

Even though I liked talking to Axel because he was kind and made me laugh, I was so ready to go collapse into my bed and dream away my problems.

"You look sleepy," Axel noted as I yawned.

I nodded and smiled. "Very long day…"

He grew serious. "Sora…" My eyes went to his and I swallowed. "Even though I had a great night with you…I'm not really satisfied that you shoved off all my questions about your neck."

I lowered my eyes and stared at the ground. I was afraid. I didn't even want to remember what had happened. And…maybe it never would again. Maybe this would be the only time. Besides…if I had the money to give Vanitas then he wouldn't…he wouldn't have had to resort to using me as his payment. So therefore, all I had to do was make sure that I always had money whenever Vanitas asked…

"Sora…I'm really not comfortable with thinking of anyone…doing that to you. Especially if you didn't want it…you're positive it wasn't Riku?"

I shook my head. "It…wasn't Riku…"

"Then who, Sora? And why? You seemed so upset. You weren't…raped or anythin—"

"I—! No…I wasn't…" My eyes were slightly watering. It was horrible. I was so happy that I hadn't cried in hours and now everything was ruined again.

Axel grabbed my wrists and glared forcefully at me. "Tell me who it was. I promise nothing bad will happen. I want to help you."

Even though Axel looked sincere and like he really did want to help…there was no way I was going to tell him. I wasn't ready to even talk about it…and then there was the fact that if I told him it really was Vanitas that sold me out, he'd beat him up and Van would defiantly tell my mom and dad…

"Axel…I have to go…"

He sighed angrily and I looked away from him. "Either you tell me or I'm not letting you leave."

"I have to go!" I yelled, squirming in his grasp. He really wasn't letting me go, so I tried with more force. I accidentally kicked over what was left of the cookies and it was then that Axel pinned me to the wall and stared at me with fire in his eyes.

"_Who did it_?"

"_No_ one!" I was shaking my head back and forth, trying to rid myself of any tears. That was easier said than done though.

Axel pushed further, his words ridged and coarse. "Who the _fuck _did it?"

"Please, Axel! It wasn't anyone…please…" I felt my body go limp and he let me fall to the floor.

I curled in on myself and cried softly. He sighed again. "If you'd just tell me who it was then I could end all of this."

"It wouldn't end it…you'd just make it worse…" I told him earnestly.

He growled and knelt down next to me. "And how the hell would I be making it worse, hmmm?"

I looked away from him, trying to hide my shame. "Because I know you would…"

"Is that supposed to imply something about me?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No…it's nothing against you. Anyone would be making it worse. You…have to trust me, Axel. If…if this happens again…I'll…"

"You'll what?" he pressed when I stopped talking.

"I'll…tell you…" I didn't even know if that was the truth or not. I had no idea if I really would tell him anything or if I'd totally ditch that idea. I guess…it was always an option.

He sighed for the third time, loudly and heavily this time as he held out a hand for me. "It had better not happen again, ya hear me?"

I smiled slightly, looking at him. "Mmm." I nodded and he helped me up from the floor.

Axel walked me home and just before he left, he gave me a small kiss on the cheek. Of course I flushed bright red and he just laughed haughtily, waving with one hand as he walked away from my house.

_I don't get Axel…I don't get anyone any more…_

I kicked off my shoes as I entered the house. It was around eight and I smelled the aftermaths of dinner. As I walked into the kitchen I saw my mother in the study, glasses on and her eyes trained on the computer screen.

Suddenly I heard Vanitas…defiantly someone I didn't want to see or hear...or have anything to do with for the rest of my life.

"Moooom…get me some chips, would ya?"

My heart beat was frantic as I clutched the refrigerator handle. My mother turned around and saw me, frowning but not at me in particular.

"Sora, would you be a dear and get Vanitas his chips. He's been asking me for almost an hour and I'm swamped with work right now."

I was about to ask why he couldn't just get up and get his own darn chips, but decided against it. I didn't want to fight with my mother about something so stupid and besides, she needed this time to work.

So against my better judgment, I went into the cupboard and found a bag of Doritos. I really wanted to open the bag up and spit in it…just to teach the big jerk a lesson. But he probably would ask why they were open…and slimy.

I walked into the living room and approached my evil brother with caution. Standing at least five feet away from him I tossed the bag towards him. It hit him on the nose and fell to the floor.

He glared at me. "The fuck?"

"There's your stupid chips. Stop bugging mom."

"_Ohhh_…Sora's acting all tough now, huh?" he eyed me thoroughly, "Nice hickeys you got there. Those guy's teach you a lesson this morning?" he laughed, his voice sounded creaky, like it needed some oil.

My eyes landed on the floor and I flushed. "You're the worst brother ever; I just thought you should know that. Because of what you did, my whole day was ruined. And probably the rest of my life." Maybe I was being a little overdramatic, but really…I think I had the right to be. He had sold me out for drugs. His own flesh and blood. That was downright…sadistic.

Vanitas lolled his hand around; his elbow was on the couch arm rest. "Details. Listen up little bro," he reached down and picked up the chips, opening the bag with a pop. I finally noticed how large his pupils were. He…was probably really high. "I got my weed because of what happened today. And I'll be damned if I have to go another week without it. You're my ticket to what I need. And the awesome part is, it's free of charge. All you have to do is sit there and keep your little mouth shut."

He started shoveling the chips into his mouth, grinning behind every chomp.

My eyes were watering as I watched my brother eat. He felt absolutely no regret or anything for what he did to me. Rather…he was glad that he profited from it. I had always known that he was mean and cruel. When we were little, he would take all my toys and throw them into the giant mud puddle in our back yard after it rained. When I woke up and found them there he'd just laugh at me. Every time my mom bought me something new, he'd always be the one to wear it or play with it first. Though…I had gotten so used to it over the years, and he had toned down a lot since we started going to high school. For some reason…it was such a shock to me. I couldn't even believe that he would do something like this.

But it was true. Because the proof was sitting right in front of me, laughing his ass off from something he saw on the TV.

"Hey faggot, would you mind removing yourself from my view? You're totally blocking the television."

My heart constricted in my chest as a new wave of tears threatened my vision. "I hate you…" I told him, eyes watering like pools of blue.

"I don't care. Move." He didn't even look at me. He just used a hand to shoo me away, like I was some pest or animal that was unwanted.

_And…I guess that's all I am to him. _

I spent the rest of my night alone in my room, texting Axel and Roxas with no dinner. Obviously I couldn't tell them about Vanitas, but both of them tried to keep me happy. It was nice. If I didn't have them…I probably would have strayed into some kind of depression.

Morning came much too quickly. I had set my alarm an hour early, so that I would get up before Vanitas. This in turn, caused me to practically fall down the stairs because of how tired I was. Waking up at five in the morning was difficult. When I walked outside, it was still dark; I could hardly see the sun coming up. But…as I breathed in the morning air, I felt somewhat relaxed. I didn't have to worry about Vanitas for the whole day, and I had worn a scarf so that people wouldn't be staring at the marks on my neck. It was almost like I was starting over again.

The only thing different…was that Kairi hated me and my whole social life was messed up beyond belief.

I tried to not let that bother me too much.

My phone lit up as I walked to the side of the school. I spotted a bench and sat down onto it, pleasantly texting Axel back. The sun was shining at last and it warmed my skin slightly, even though there was still a bit of frost on the grass.

"Sora…? That you?"

I swallowed thickly and turned towards that voice.

Imagine my shock when I saw that silver hair and magnificent smile.

My eyes were wide and my heart was becoming unresponsive.

"What're you doing here so early?" he asked, coming to sit next to me.

I scooted over a little so that he would have enough comfortable room. It wasn't that I didn't want to be close to him…well actually, I was kind of scared of that. I didn't want to turn into some blabbering idiot like I had before.

As I looked into his turquoise eyes, my heart finally started beating again. But it wasn't long before I started crying a little.

_I met Riku…and then I turned gay. Because I'm gay…I can't tell anyone about Vanitas. Because of that I will probably always be running from my brother…_

It suddenly hurt to be near the beautiful boy. I felt sick and disgusted with myself, as if it was a crime to even be talking to him.

Riku obviously didn't see it that way, but who else would…?

"Hey…are you okay?"

I nodded and tried to hide my face. "Just…really tired, that's all."

"Well why didn't you sleep in?"

_Like I could actually answer that question truthfully…_

"I…I kind of wanted to beat the crowd I guess, heh…" I sounded stupid. I was acting stupid. My whole being was stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

"Yeah, I can understand that."

I turned towards him then, feeling a little shocked from his reply. I regretted that instantly though because just one look at him had me flustered. He was slightly hunched over, his eyes were staring into the distance, chin in a cradle that his fingers had created.

He was pretty much the picture of perfection. I noticed how silver his eyebrows were. How straight his nose was and how long his eyelashes were.

I was probably drooling when he finally looked at me.

He laughed a little and I snapped out of my stare. "What's on your mind, Brownie?"

My stomach growled. "Brownies sound really good right now…" I voiced, staring at the ground instead of him. My cheeks flushed and I wanted to slap a hand to my forehead when he started laughing again, only louder this time.

"I don't know, I'd rather have my brownie with blue eyes and cute red shorts."

"You could always put icing on it…" I was just trying to cover up the fact that I was sweating and as nervous as a small animal around him.

He thought for a moment about my suggestion but shook his head. "Nope. That won't do at all." He leaned in a bit closer to me, eyeing me slowly. "Rather…have the real thing…" His hand was coming up towards my body and I stiffened and closed my eyes. I wasn't sure what was going on but my heart was about to explode.

Suddenly my scarf was ripped from my neck, revealing the marks and a strange look from Riku's face.

"Those are hickeys, right?"

_Why…why did this always have to happen…? Why…_

I inwardly banged my head into the wall behind me as he glared slightly. All I could do was nod.

"You and Kairi go at it?"

I shook my head. "Kairi hates my guts; actually…she has ever since I chewed her out for insulting you…"

His eyes became confused but serious at the same time. "You…chewed her out?"

I nodded again. "She said something about you being some kind of hit man…I don't remember all of it, but…but, she got me really upset. So I had to say something…"

"You defended me from your girlfriend? You hardly even know me though." I guessed that he was just trying to figure out my stupidity. I wished him luck in that.

Shrugging, I said, "It doesn't matter anymore. She hates me cause…well because I didn't even talk to her after that and then I came to school yesterday…with these…" I told him, pointing to my neck even though he really didn't need to be shown.

Riku narrowed his eyes but they softened almost instantly. "So if Kairi didn't give you those…You…have another girl friend?"

"Not at all…these weren't…well, I didn't want these. But…that's about all I can tell you on the matter, I hope you understand…"

"No, I really don't."

Of course he didn't…how stupid could I get? He was like Axel in this sense. I was afraid that maybe he wouldn't give in like the redhead had.

I rubbed my eyes with my wrist and tried to smile. "It-it's really not a big deal, Riku. I'd much rather just forget about it and move on."

"You're such a bad liar," he commented, crossing his legs, still holding on to my scarf.

My brow furrowed and I went to reach for it. "Can I please have that back?"

He moved it quickly out of my grasp and shook his head. "Not until you tell me who gave you the hickeys."

My brain was frazzled as I rubbed my hands through my hair angrily. "I can't _do_ that! Why should it matter to you anyways?!" Riku looked shocked and I quickly put my hands over my mouth, my face feeling hot. "I-I'm so sorry…I didn't mean to yell…I've just…had a really bad past few days and I'm getting frustrated with almost everything. It's not you, Riku…god, I'm such an idiot…"

I buried my face in my palms and hoped that I would somehow get struck by lightning in the next couple of seconds. Either that or get mauled by a bear or ran over by a truck. Anything to escape this pain and embarrassment.

"Hey, Brownie?" I lifted my head slightly; a breeze picked up and cooled my cheeks. Riku's hair was flowing in the wind; he looked like a god of some sort.

"You're not an idiot. I'm honestly just insanely jealous. I was hoping I could steal you away from Kairi, but I guess someone else got their hands on you first."

The wind was the only thing I could hear. It sounded way too loud in my ears as I just stared at the magnificent boy. Had I really just heard him right…?

Of course I mouthed the first stupid question I could think of. "Riku…you're…gay?"

The mood was instantly destroyed, thanks to me, when he turned to me and glared daggers. "Oh, like you don't like guys either."

"I don't!" I spouted, suddenly so defensive.

Riku rolled his gorgeous eyes. "Yeah right."

"I had a girlfriend before I met you…"

"But then you met me. And look where you are now." He was smirking, but just a tiny bit. He looked so menacing, as if he was going to attack me with his eyes.

I clenched my teeth in my mouth and sighed. I couldn't argue with him there. Because he was so darn right about it…

I had nothing to say so I resumed my position of face in palms, leaning over the bench like I was going to hurl. My stomach wanted to, but I hadn't eaten anything besides those cookies in almost a day.

"I can tell you like me, Sora," Riku said, adding to my stomach pain.

I shook my head. "You're crazy…"

_No, he really isn't. He's actually right. Like, dead on._

Of course I was too much of a coward to admit that to his face.

"You look at me like I'm some kind of shiny toy you're dying to get your hands all over."

My eyes went wide and I stared at the ground through my fingers.

He continued, "Which is why this whole ordeal is confusing the hell out of me. That ginger guy was totally defensive of you. I have a feeling maybe he's the one who—"

"It wasn't Axel! No way! He likes Roxas!"

"Then what? Is he some kind of older brother figure? Because he was giving off some weird ass vibes. When he hit me I honestly wasn't going to hit him back until I thought of you and him together."

I groaned and stood up from the bench, my feet taking me in circles in front of the boy. "It wasn't Axel. It wasn't anyone! Just…let it go…please."

"You gave _yourself _the hickeys?"

"If I say yes will you drop it?"

He glared slightly. "No."

I started angrily stomping away from him but turned around when I remembered he still had my scarf.

"Forgetting something?" He waved the cloth in front of him; still sitting cross legged on the bench.

I glared at the ground and held out my hand. "May I please have that back?"

"For a price."

My mind went to him throwing me in the dirt and covering my neck with fresh marks.

I flushed uncontrollably. "What do you want…?"

He stood up and walked towards me, stopping when he was inches from my body. I had to strain my neck to look up at the boy. He was probably seven inches taller than me.

He wrapped the scarf around the back of my neck and pulled me so close to him I could smell his cologne.

With his face leaned down very close to mine he said, "One kiss and you'll be on your way."

_NO. NO. NO. _

"I-but-you, why do you—"

"You're stuttering," he noted, his lips coming dangerously close to mine.

"Riku…" I said his name and it mixed with the wind, blowing away as if he never heard it.

Without my consent he pressed his soft lips to mine. I had to remember to keep myself standing up because he was making me melt.

At first he hardly moved his lips at all; it reminded me so much yet so little of Kairi's kisses. But then he opened his mouth a little, bit on my lower lip and rolled his tongue over the flesh. I knew then that this was way too different to be anywhere near how a girl would kiss me.

My whole head was clouded in a messy aura of…mess.

I couldn't even think straight. I wondered for a moment if he was going to get tired of me because I wasn't even responding.

He urged me to move my lips, but I couldn't. I was like a statue.

He finally pulled back and chuckled, using this thumb to wipe off the edge of my lip.

"You need some practice, Brownie."

It wasn't practice I needed. All I required was the feeling back in my legs.


End file.
